The Sarcasm Gene

I’ve always operated on the assumption that somewhere on the DNA helix rested the sarcasm gene. A scientist could point to its native region and say:

“This is the part of your DNA structure that tells us if you are a pleasure, or a pain in the ass to be around. It’s something that is passed down from generation to generation. Kind of like hair, or eye color.”

(This scientist would have a remarkably pedestrian dialect for an advanced education, but you know…)

I believed that my grandpa likely passed his sarcasm to my dad, and my dad lovingly gave it to me. It’s my duty to treat this family hand-me-down as if it were a nice relic, such as a piece of furniture or a watch. It’s my duty to keep it traveling to a new generation.

Apparently it is not passed on quite the way I imagined. Time with the sarcastic is a strong requirement in honing your interpretation skills.

Another way to say it – sarcasm is learned, not inherited. Yet another way to say it is toddlers will follow your words, and not your inflection. I feel oddly disappointed at this revelation.

Much to Jamie’s detriment, both Meg and I lean toward the sarcastic side. We recently found ourselves scrambling to put together a bag of Jamie’s stuff before we all left the house for a cookout with some friends.

“I go too?” Jamie asked, with genuine concern.

I wish I could say that my restraint was due to me taking the high ground here. Who am I kidding? No I don’t. Meg just simply beat me to this one.

“No kid. Daddy is going. I’m going. Captain is going. You’re staying here,” she told him.

If the sarcasm gene were real, surely it would be coded with some natural ability to decipher when people are joking, but sadly this is not the case. He would understand what a ridiculous (and dangerous) idea it would be to leave him home alone. We would have all been OK, and had a good laugh at this point.

“NOOOO I WANT TO GO TOOOOOO!!!” He insisted.

The smile turned upside down and tears were being conjured up as he worked to convince us of the urgency to the situation. Jamie took mommy at her word, which in this instance was a dangerous thing to do.

Genetic or learned – the fact remains we have a long-standing tradition in this family that spans back several generations. We clearly have work to do.

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